An Open Letter To Straight People Who Get Married

Dear Straight People Who Get Married:

I get the fact that you're "in love" (whatever that is supposed to mean). I get the fact that you want to spend the rest of your lives together (good luck). I get the fact that you have found each other and want the whole world to know it, and I get the fact that you want to reap in the benefits that are afforded to people who get married. I get it.

I've shaken your hands, patted your backs, told you "congratulations" more times than I'm actually proud to admit. I've purchased gifts, served you cocktails, raised a champagne fluke to you and proposed toasts in your honor. And each time I did, I did because I cared for you, and because I was happy that you were happy. Each time I did, it was sincere and done out of love rather than spite or anger or shame for my country.

In a world where globalization is more certain than ever and where networking sites like Facebook are becoming essential elements of socialization, its easy to forget the pains of minorities and the struggling class. Documenting and photographing everything has become so ordinary that many fail to see the parallels between their small celebrations and other's ongoing deprivation.

So, in an open letter to straight people who get married: knowing you are getting married is enough for me to be happy for you. When you start plastering your photographs all over Myspace and start changing your names and relationship status on Facebook, it starts to really grind my nerves.

And its not because I'm jealous, because that should be a given. Its because I'm peeved that you have the audacity to shove the rights that are handed to you like a heterosexual family heirloom down the throats of people you call your friends, your family, when they don't have those same rights. When they have to fight for those same rights. When they have to fight for those same rights, and most of the time lose.

I know a couple who refuse to get married until everyone in the country has the right to marry whomever they choose. I think that is admirable, but I don't think that everyone should be like them. I understand why people get married, and, like I said before, I sincerely wish those who get married nothing but the best. I just don't understand how people who get married can be so insensitive to the timely subject of second-class citizenship amongst their kith and kin.

If I ever am allowed to get married, I'd want you to come to my wedding, so I do hope this does not offend you. Hell, I'm not even sure if I want to get married, should the opportunity with the right man present itself. But I'd like to be able to have a choice is what it all boils down to. I want to be able to marry a Vegas stripper at four in the morning in a drunken roofied stupor just like a heterosexual can. Until the day comes when I can, I'll continue to judge you and your wedding photos, and count down the days until your divorce.

Just kidding.

1 comment:

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